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Thursday, December 17, 2009

I LOVE YOU DAD!!

While visiting John's family in Washington my dad had to go into the hospital because all the sudden he couldn't feel his legs. While that doesn't sound scary enough they found bleeding on his spine that they think was caused by medication he was taking for his heart. Now he's off the important medication for his heart and its a wait and see game right now. The doctor's released him and told him he may not have feeling completely back for 2-3 weeks and to take it easy. Well, after talking to him several times since being back from Washington he sounds terrible and is obviously extremely upset that he's not only weak but still doesn't have the feeling back. It sounds like he's able to get around but not comfortably on top of that he explained while trying to write out x-mas cards he's finding it hard to write as well. He's refusing to call his doctor because he doesn't want to get admitted again to the hospital especially for x-mas so he's just trying to wait it out. I'm scared to death with whats going on with him and more importantly its killing me that I'm not home right now to help him get things done. Luckily after tomorrow my step-mom will be off of work for a while and my sister is coming into town as well. John keeps telling me to just go and be with him but now that I know he's going to have help and other people around I think its best that I stay home and perhaps make the trip after the holidays. I'm praying that there's not something more serious going on with him and he's making the right decision by not going back to the doctor. He hates being in the hospital just as much as I do and I know exactly how he's feeling with not wanting to be there especially around this time. However, as selfish as it sounds I want my dad to be around for a really long time and I hope he knows how much it will kill me if anything happens to him. I can't explain my love for him, but my life just won't be the same if he's not in it. I'm hoping perhaps 2009 was just a bad year for him and 2010 is going to be his year of good health.